"That voice will not win today!"

I had a bad night last night. I felt like I was dreaming all night long. Unfortunately I remembered most of them. It was like a revisit of my past. A reminder of everything I have lost. My lost of innocence, my beloved grandparents, the house at Newport Beach (my safe place) and the loss of dear friends. I have no idea what my conscious was try to tell me, or if a dream is just a dream, who knows. All I know is right at this moment I am not "in-spirit" or "present" at all. I feel like I am in a fog, desperately searching for the road that will lead me home. I feel disconnected. Now, right this second I have a choice, a choice to follow the path that was laid out for me this morning and have a bad day or to change my thoughts, change the way I feel and have a great day. The question is can I do this? My stomach is churning, the waves of anxiety is in the pit of my stomach. Is it too late? No, it is never too late to choose joy and peace. I hear the doubt, as the voice in my head screams, yeah right. That voice will not win today. So, day here I come! Everybody have a great day, I know I will.

Lauren